So Gay

The Scene: Rich's Cigars. I know half the staff, but I bullshit with some of the new people.

Me: You have Gryphon tattooed on your foot.
Girl: Gryphon is my last name.
Me: So, like, if you get murdered, then they'll know who it is.
Girl: Something like that.
Me: I only have one tattoo. It's right here (points above heart). It says "So Gay"
Girl: Can I see it?
Me: (said not as a proposition) No, you can only see it if you have sex with me.
Girl:....
Me: Hey, you know, I understand, not everybody bites.
Girl: Really?
Me: Oh yeah, and it works too, cause some girls actually do go home with me, and then, after sex, I'm all like "well, you read the tattoo. I told you. So gay."
Girl: It's like a disclaimer.
Me: Exactly! It's truth in advertising.
Girl: Can I see it?
Me: You know the rules.
Girl: Are you fucking with me?
Me: ....
Girl: Seriously, are you being serious?
Me: ...